Anne Of Cleves
Henry’s fourth wife was Anne of Cleves, reincarnated in Wife After Wife as Anki from Cleveland.
People often feel sorry for Anne, rejected by Henry when she didn’t match up to her portrait. Like a disappointing profile pic. But I think of her as the wife who won at being Mrs Tudor. Not only did she manage to avoid any hanky panky in the marital bed, she also received a generous settlement when she agreed to an annulment. This included Richmond Palace and Hever Castle. The latter was the childhood home of her predecessor Anne Boleyn. I often wonder whether Anne of Cleves imagined the other Anne walking ahead of her on a staircase, sitting in the same spot by the fire, staring up at the same ceiling when she was in bed.
After their shaky start, Anne and Henry became great friends, and Anne was referred to as ‘The King’s Beloved Sister’.
Anne’s profile pic, by Hans Holbein the Younger
Anne of Cleves’ initials carved into a wooden panel at Hever Castle, which she received as part of her annulment settlement.
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This marriage was strategic. Henry was keen for a Protestant alliance in the face of the threat from Catholic France, and the Holy Roman Empire. Anne ticked all the political boxes, and the portraitist Holbein was dispatched with instructions not to PortraitShop – Henry wanted accuracy.
- Contemporary reports described Anne of Cleves as tall and slim, with fair hair and a pretty face. ‘Of middling beauty’ said the French ambassador. But the French are picky.
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When Anne arrived in England, Henry rode down to Rochester in Kent, where Anne was staying en route to London, to surprise her. Anne was standing looking out of a window, watching bull-baiting, when Henry-in-disguise appeared by her side, gave her a squeeze and a kiss, and a present. Having no idea who this joker was, she gave him a funny look and carried on gazing out the window. Henry didn’t give up. He changed his coat to one of purple velvet (big hint; purple = royal.). But it was too late. He’d seen the horror in her eyes, and he in return was unimpressed with Anne. ‘She is nothing so fair as she hath been reported,’ he said.
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In spite of all this, the marriage took place, but it wasn’t consummated. ‘I liked her before not well,’ he said to Cromwell, who had organised the marriage, ‘but now I like her much worse.’
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This sad little marriage was soon put out of its misery with an annulment. Anne had a happy life in England, and outlived Henry. #winner
